BoyJake Types From the UK

I arrived in Birmingham, UK for a work thing on Monday morning, at least a day too early, but when I was booking the tickets I got really frustrated trying to coordinate the best price with the best itinerary and the schedule of my work thing and I finally just pushed the button on a bad itinerary (two layovers, one in Houston and one really LONG one in Newark) that had very little to do with the work thing schedule just because it was the cheapest and I was tired of looking.

Arriving at my fancy boutique hotel in Birmingham's City Centre at 8AM I found the staff a bit perplexed. It took two well-dressed, well-spoken Brits to punch away at the computer and try to find me a room. I could have been nice and dropped my bags off and went for a walk, but I knew it was Easter Monday and nothing but pubs would be open and I knew I smelled bad and I very much wanted to take a shower and change clothes.

I excused myself to use the gents and when I returned they had found me a temporary solution. One of the Brits seemed very keen to help me upstairs with my bag, but I told him I could manage and asked him to direct me to the room. He told me it was on the third floor (which would be the fourth in the USA) and gave me a key with a large metal and leather fob on it. Say what you want about those little plastic key cards they give you in big chain modern hotels -- they lack character but they're pretty damn portable. He advised me to make a right when the lift opened and told me that we could arrange for me to move to the room I was originally booked into later in the day.

I found my room, named for a winery I had never heard of -- all of the rooms in this hotel are named for wineries and all the art on the walls is wine-themed. Once I had the door open I found that the bed was just far enough from the door to allow it to open. I had to lift my suitcase and move into the room sideways in order to close the door behind me -- a very small room indeed. I stayed at this hotel for this particular work thing last year and I remember my room being much larger. I disrobed and started looking for something to put my dirty clothes in, but I didn't find a single drawer or even a laundry bag. I stuffed them into a spare compartment in my suitcase and headed to the shower. The showers in this place are delightful. The shower head is the size of a dinner plate and standing under its stream makes me feel like I'm standing under a warm waterfall. I washed my hair and everything else before emerging to dress again.

I plugged in the computer and did some work stuff. I called down to the front desk to find out when MY room would be ready and they said after two. Whenever I travel to Europe I always tell myself that THIS will be the time that I beat jet lag. I never beat jet lag. I never beat jetlag because I ALWAYS go to sleep when I shouldn't. I went to sleep. I woke up at 5 PM. I called down to reception to see if my room was ready. It was. The manager, a nice woman that I don't remember very much about now came up to swap keys and get my signature on a registration card. I don't remember much about her because I was groggy from almost eight hours of sleep that I shouldn't have indulged in. Somehow I ended up in a gigantic room with a gigantic bathroom containing a huge shower and a completely separate freestanding bathtub. I couldn't believe it. Once I had my stuff where I wanted it, I grabbed my camera and a notebook and headed out to find some dinner.

The Figure of Eight pub on Broad Street is my favorite in Birmingham. I ate fish and chips washed down with a pint of John Smith's Extra Smooth, one of my favorite English ales. Then I went to see a movie. Danny Boyle's Sunshine won't be out in the US until September, but it's out here. I saw and it's awesome. So neener neener neener. I slept very little that night because I slept when I shouldn't have. The next day my partner in crime arrived and we had breakfast in a pub before walking to our event venue. They weren't ready for us. We would have to come back tomorrow to set up the Cyber Cafe. We walked around a mall and had dinner at another pub. I had steak and ale pie with mashed potatoes and gray peas (I didn't eat the gray peas) washed down with a pint of Old Speckled Hen, one of my favorite English Ales. I slept very little that night because I slept when I shouldn't have. The next day (yesterday) we set up the Cyber Cafe before going on a little pub crawl. I found a small smoky pub full of locals where we drank beers before moving on to another small smoky pub full of locals where we drank beers before repeating the process. We finally landed at and Australian themed place where I ate a steak and washed it down with another pint of John Smith's.

Now I'm sitting in the Cyber cafe bored out of my mind. I'm sure Birmingham has all sorts of wonderful opportunities for educational cultural experiences, but all I seem to do is drink and eat fatty food. I still haven't really slept. I miss Anna and I'm ready to come home.

That is all.

Thanks for playing.